Indie Author Interview: Laura Weber

LWToday we are going to talk with Indie Author Laura Weber, author of Goddesses Don’t Wear Orange. This lovely Pennsylvanian is an absolute darling and I hope she can cross seeing a teacup pig in a raincoat off her list!

Writing Related:

1. When did you know writing was what you wanted to do?

As a child, I loved writing stories about anything and everything. My first *attempt* at a novel was entitled “The Pregnant Man” at age 9. It’s hysterical and poorly written, and I love my young self for ‘going for it’ back then!

2. Tell us a little bit about your next project (or current project).

I am currently working on a nervous breakdown comedy inspired by my own experiences managing my mental health and learning how to human. It wasn’t meant to be a comedy initially, but as it turns out, I only enjoy writing if it’s comedic *puts on clown nose, shrugs*

3. Where do you get your inspiration for your books?

Most of my inspiration is from my own experiences and experiences others have shared with me. Especially if we have found a way to make something serious into something comical. I also shared recently that the band Lonely Island is a huge inspiration which is bizarre or goofy, but I think they are bold, unapologetic, clever (most of the time haha), and catchy.

4. What is your writing Kryptonite?

Hmmm…like what stops me from writing? I would say self-doubt or perfectionism respectively. On my worst days I think, “This has already been written before and by a better writer so why bother?” or “This is terrible even though I’ve worked on it for three whole minutes (months), it’s hopeless!” But I think every author goes through this cycle, and the difference between being an author and never being an author is whether we chose to push through the insecurity or whether we let it overtake us.

5. As a writer, what would you choose as your mascot/avatar/spirit animal?

Sea Otter, hands down. They are cute, cuddly, and snacky.

6. What would the main character in your book have to say about you?

This is an incredible question. Florence, in Goddesses Don’t Wear Orange, would say that I’m not bitter enough for her liking, and I could use a little edge. But she still loves me even though I am a naïve love dolphin in the Sea of Optimism. And my new main character would say that I am a fellow passenger on the Hot Mess Express who is hogging the window seat.

7. If you had to give up either snacks and drinks during writing sessions, or music, which would you find more difficult to say goodbye to?

Definitely the snacks and drinks. I do my best writing with a kombucha and something to dip into peanut butter.

8. Do you feel like it’s most important to have A) Strong characters B) Mind-blowing Plot twists or C) Epic settings?

Strong characters for sure. I love mind-blowing plot twists, but I’ve read a lot of works that don’t have a crazy twist, and see the beauty in it. As for epic settings, that is my greatest weakness. I am not terribly visual, and it’s definitely what I am working on most in my new works: world building in an interesting, coherent, and not overly superfluous way.

9. Do you feel like you’d be a better writer if you wore sparkly socks during your writing sessions?

No way, Jose. I love seeing fun socks, but they feel like baby straightjackets on my feet. I gotsta wiggle muh toes!

10. What is the funniest typo you’ve ever written?

This is one of my favorite stories. My editor didn’t catch it because she thought it was an unusual but purposeful turn of phrase, but thank goodness I caught it before it got published. The sentence says “I smiled so wide, I thought my face would cramp.” But I had accidentally put, “I smiled so wide, I thought my face would crap.”

I still laugh every time I think of that disgustingly hilarious visual!

Non-Writing Related:

1. You’re a new addition to the crayon box. What color would you be and why?

SCOBY white. Because I make my own kombucha, and even though SCOBIES look like mushroom aliens, they are the key to making my favorite drink, and I secretly love how grossed out people are by them!

2. What do you think about when you’re alone in your car?

Imaginary arguments with people, post-apocalyptic scenarios, new scenes for my books, future adventures, babies and/or puppies, wherever my mind takes me whilst listening to Owl City. Giggling about Brooklyn 99 episodes.

3. What’s your favorite ’90s jam?

Spice Girls—“If you wanna be my lover.”

4. Who would win a fight between Spiderman and Batman?

PSH. Spiderman—poor, winnow-y, and still finding a place in this world? He’s the underdog we all root for! Sure, Batman is good-looking, rich, and established, but who has time for that hero?

5. A penguin walks through that door right now wearing a sombrero. What does he say and why is he here?

“I came all the way from the North Pole for my Mexican getaway!”

“Um…you only made it the Pennsylvania, love.”

“…..”

*Takes him to favorite Mexican restaurant, healing his embarrassment with zesty salsa and crunchy tortilla chips.*

6. On average, how many times a week do you hurt yourself trying to dance in the shower?

Zero. My shower dance moves are as silky as my legs. Kidding, what is a ‘razor’?

7. Would you rather fight one horse-sized duck, or 100 duck-sized horses?

Definitely 100 duck-sized horses! Wayyy more puntable. (Sorry, mini-horses).

8. If there was a movie produced about your life, who would play you and why?

Tina Fey would play me. Mostly because I would LOVE to meet her, and because her character Liz Lemon from 30 Rock is very nearly to my spirit person.

9. If you were to trade places someone else for one month, living or dead, famous or not, fictional or real, whom would you like that person to be?

There are so many different answers I have for this, but I would say I would like to trade places with someone in the writer’s room of Brooklyn 99 so I could see the creation of that type of comedy in person. So many of those comedy writers are unknown by the public, but they are hidden treasures troves of hilarity. Also, I would love to meet/write with Andy Samberg.

10. If aliens visited you and asked you for anything you wish for or gave you a position on their home planet, what can you choose?

I’m a major homebody and I’ve got a thing for planet Earth, so I would go for the wish! Maybe the ability to nap whenever I want without getting caught? Or to be fully rested and energized whenever I want? Or to be able to drink coffee without getting insane heartburn?…. Admittedly, I just ate lunch and I’m a bit sleepy so this *may* be influencing my wish list.

About the Author:

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Laura Weber is a professional at awkward encounters, meeting eccentric people, and clumsily learning life lessons…so she writes about it. Social worker by day, human being by night––she’s seen it all. Except for a teacup pig in a raincoat (but she lives in hope). She resides in Pennsylvania with her husband Aric and her dogs, Apollo and Olive.

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